Oh my god I could do it

Few days back read a beautiful article entitled - "The Purpose of Yoga is to Get Out of My Own Way" and as my learning and practice sessions continue I realize how correct it is.

I joined Morarji Institute of Yoga, New Delhi, last month. The first real yoga that I did was the marathon I had on the day of registration. The institute is a government body but to my surprise the "chalta hai" attitude wasn't working. People at the center were strict. 

I pay Rs.25/- and get my forms. The person at the counter gave me the form saying "Read the instructions well written behind the form and submit it along with all supporting documents and the fees by 5pm". I take a seat on one of the chairs put aside, keep my bag on the floor and flip the pages. The first thing I notice in the instruction list was the submission of school / college certificate along with 2 passport size photographs. I go to the desk and check if I could submit it later". The answer was "You have time till 5pm, else your form stands rejected ". I see my watch - it was 2 in the afternoon. It was a hot humid summer day of May in Delhi and I stayed in Faridabad. I was sure I would not be able to do it but something inside said "No harm giving it a try". I had no vehicle with me - so took the metro - reached home - took my certificates out - realized no photocopies - rushed to the photocopier - walking half a kilometer in the hot sun - got the copies made - took an auto to the nearest photo studio - which was another 2 kms away - requested for a quick shot which looked horrible but still recognizable - took the shared auto to the metro station - got in to the train - reached the other end of the station - took an auto again - and reached the center at 4:50pm - Phewwww what a run !.

The man at the counter looked at me - looked at the watch - and said - "we have closed the counter". Started the second round - fought with him - requested him - pleaded him - and then he says "Ok give it to me". 

With a sigh of relief I hand him my papers - along with copies of my certificates - my photographs - and my fees. The receipt and the registration card gave me a feeling of winning a gold medal after an Olympics realizing "Oh my god, I could do it ! "

First day First class First instruction - "The classes will start sharp at 3:30 sharp. Arriving at 3:31 also, will not be allowed in". I had opted for the evening classes thinking it will be easier as compared to the 6 am classes but I was mistaken - even reaching on time at 3:30 was a challenge. After a full month of the course, the attendance sheet showing no late marks came again as a feel good thing and a self pat realizing "Oh my god, I could do it !"

The next round of challenges came in with the aasanas. My first reaction was "Ok,will I be able to do it?"

Th first set of asanas that I learnt was few breathing techniques. For the first time I became aware that only one of my nostrils was operational meaning I was inhaling and exhaling from one only side of my nose and the other side was completely blocked. I thought to myself "No wonder I went through all that rounds of headache, heaviness etc." 

Form then on, every step, every pose and every asana started with a self doubt "Will I be able to do it ? " and then moving on to all the self pity things - my injuries, my thoughts, my actions, my inaction's, my failures, my limitations and then concluding on all my feelings and judgments about my own limitations.  

In the process I realized two things that my unawareness of my own body was my first obstacle in the way of good health followed with my judgments. 

But slowly and gradually as I started growing with the practice of yoga, I understood the significance to be aware of my own "Self", my own "Body", my own "Mind" and my own "Judgments" about almost on all of it at all times and kick them out one-by-one, patiently & lovingly. 

If I look back, me making it from Ashoka Road, New Delhi to Faridabad up and down in public transport, in 2 hours, managing all the jobs in between, Passing out without a single late red mark attendance and then now being able to do all asanas in the perfect manner was something that was only possible by fighting against all the things that came my way. 

True is the statement from the article : 

“Yoga is not about doing the asanas—it’s about un-doing what’s in the way of the asanas.” by Rebecca Lammers.